Trust In Me
by ellesxjadore
Summary: After a particually emotional mission, Zaf can't seem to find his feet. To make matters worse, a visit to see his family leaves him presumed dead by MI5. Months later, Harry sends Jo in to infiltrate the Muslim extremists thought responsible for his death


_Hello there, fellow Spooks/MI-5 fans! My name is Corporal Scarlett, I'm a huge fan of Spooks, particularly Mr Younis! I'm attempting a story, but be warned, it may not be updated for a while, so please bear with me. For all you Harry/Ruth fans (and I know there's a lot of you), this isn't a Harry/Ruth story, sorry. But please, read on! It may capture your interest in another way! _

_And if you'd like a song for this chapter, I'd advise you listen to any of these:_

**My Immortal **by Evanescence, **What If **by Kate Winslet, **Hear You Me **by Jimmy Eat World, **Clumsy **by Our Lady Peace, **Chasing Cars **by Snow Patrol or **I'm Not Dead **by Pink.

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**Trust In Me**

**By Corporal Scarlett**

**Chapter One – There For You**

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Taking a break from tapping away at the keyboard, Zafar Younis held up his wrist, glancing at his watch. Time was ticking away slowly, more slowly than usual, he noticed. The radiation from the computer screen glared at him furiously, causing his dark eyes to strain. The office in Thames House was silent, apart from the gentle sound of Zaf typing out his report, due in to Adam the next morning. He breathed in deeply and sighed, feeling too tired to continue. It wasn't possible.

Adding to his tiredness was an incredible guilt, one which would possibly haunt him for the rest of his life. Zaf leant his head onto his perched hands, trying to forget the previous week. It had been a case he'd never forget. He'd become emotionally involved, something which was forbidden when working as a spook. It had compromised his position, and nearly got himself killed. Someone else had paid the price, though.

Mina Allan was a young Muslim girl Zaf had been instructed to protect from a suspected extremist, Hassan Naveed. Only twenty-five years of age, Mina had been used as an alibi for Hassan and his small group of terrorists many times. Zaf had tracked her, followed her, and finally convinced her to speak against Hassan and help MI5. Zaf kept her under lock and key. He wouldn't have let anything happen to her.

After sharing a small flat over a short period of time, they grew closer and became friends. Mina confided in Zaf, and they couldn't deny themselves they had become too close.

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_The night was deathly quiet, and only echoed the ghostly sound of a lone owl. The sky was clouded over, the moon and stars absent. No cars drove along the street. The roadsides were deserted. Not a single, disturbed soul wandered the empty pathways. Zaf peered out of the stained window, staring out into the darkness. The flat he was in was pathetic. No central heating, no bath, no carpets, and, most annoyingly, only one tiny single bed, which simply wasn't adequate for both him and Mina to share. But, forever the gentleman, Zaf had offered her the bed. Instead, he managed a few hours of sleep on the cold floor._

_That particular night, Zaf couldn't sleep. He often suffered from insomnia. His theory was that it came with the job. And this job wasn't going too well. There'd been threats against Mina's life that day, and Zaf wasn't taking any chances. This girl didn't deserve to die. He didn't want her to die._

_Lost in his own thoughts, Zaf didn't hear the almost silent footsteps behind him. "Nadir?" came a soft, sleepy voice. Zaf spun around at the sound of his false name, and his sleepless eyes landed on the petite Muslim woman, whom he'd thought to be fast asleep. He grimaced as she joined him by the window. "What are you doing?" Her eyes were so inquisitive. _

"_Nothing," he sighed, "I just can't sleep. I keep hearing things." She came closer still._

"_What things? Are you scared?"_

_Zaf hesitated. "A little, yes." 'Wrong answer. Now she'd ask why.'_

"_Why? Why are you scared?" Mina persisted gently._

'_Shit. I can't lie to her. But if I answer her truthfully, it could be the whole mission at risk.' He turned to face her directly. "I'm scared for you, Mina." His gaze fell, ashamed of what he had said. He felt her soft hand lift his chin up._

"_Don't be. I know what awaits me, and I cannot escape the inevitable." She spoke so confidently, yet her voice was riddled with sadness. "I'm just glad that I'll able to spend what time I have left with you, Nadir."_

_Her words tugged painfully on his heartstrings. Zaf felt as though he couldn't lie to her anymore. Not when she trusted him so fully._

"_Mina, my name isn't Nadir," he said slowly. "It's Zafar, or Zaf, if you like. I came here to protect you –"_

_She cut him off. "I'm not stupid, you know. Why else would you suddenly turn up, pretending to be my friend, pretending to like me, as soon as my life is put in jeopardy?" Zaf fell silent. "Look, I'm not angry with you. Perhaps you may have been pretending, but I wasn't."_

_By now, Zaf's senses had all been focussed on Mina. What she looked like in the shadow, her smell of white musk, and finally the taste of her lips. Her kiss was sweet and innocent, loving and kind; all the things he'd imagined it to be. As his lips caressed hers, Zaf became aware of a car's headlights illuminating the street. He pulled himself away from Mina's embrace and stared outside. Four people stepped out of a black Mercedes, two of them wielding handguns. _

_Thinking fast, Zaf grabbed Mina's hand and pulled her towards the fire exit at the back of the flat. Mina began to protest, but Zaf silenced her with a sharp look. She knew what it meant. They were coming for her._

_As agile as foxes, the two slipped down the fire escape, their footsteps barely emitting a sound, and jogged along the street. Zaf pulled out his mobile phone and dialled a number. _

"_Jo? He's after us. We're on Park Lane; can you send a car? Right. Bye." He shoved his phone back into his pocket._

"_Who was that?" Mina asked, shivering at the cold._

"_A colleague," Zaf replied shortly. "Listen, we need to find somewhere to hide. We couldn't get out in time; they would've followed us." He attempted to pull her in another direction, but she stopped him._

"_Zafar, I'm not afraid. My time has come. You can't stop it. I've given you my evidence."_

'_No, she can't! I need her! I lo… I can't even say it. Look at me! She's not scared at all, and here I am, afraid to tell her three little words!'_

_A gunshot fired, and Zaf's heart missed a beat. He pushed the wide-eyed Mina against a wall and stood in front of her, protecting her. She tried to pull away, but he refused. They heard running footsteps just metres away. A harsh voice spoke._

"_You there, step away," he said calmly, aiming a handgun effortlessly at Zaf's chest, "it's not you we want. Move now and you can go."_

_Zaf shook his head reluctantly, his pulse pounding. "No."_

"_What did you say?" spat another man._

"_I said no."_

_The first man cocked his gun. "Have it your way." Zaf felt himself be pushed to the ground and the man pulled the trigger. He cried out, but Mina was dead before she hit the ground. _

_The gun was lowered. "Job well done, boys. Let's head back."_

_Zaf didn't notice them leave. He pulled Mina's lifeless body into his arms and cradled her beautiful head. He located the wound, already issuing crimson blood. Sobbing, Zaf check her pulse, not believing what he already knew. Nothing. She was gone…_

_---_

"Zaf?" came an inquiring female voice. Hurriedly, Zaf wiped away any traces of tears with the back of his hand. He looked up to see Jo Portman coming towards him, a stack of papers and files in her arms. "Have you been here all night?" She sounded concerned.

Zaf nodded reluctantly. "What time is it?"

"Five o'clock. Care to explain why you slept here of all places?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. I was finishing a report late last night. Must have fallen asleep." Jo raised her knowledgeable eyebrows. "Honestly, Jo." Pouting, she dumped the files onto her desk, and then sat on it, facing Zaf's tired face.

"Are you…okay, Zaf?" she asked worriedly. "I mean, you haven't been yourself for days." She paused, trying to tread carefully. He was emotionally unbalanced at this particular time. She knew why; Adam had filled her in, as he knew Zaf had a soft spot for Jo. She hoped he'd open up to her; let him get the mission and the girl, Mina, out of his system. It was unnatural and unhealthy. "You can talk to me. I'll help you," she said softly.

Zaf didn't look at her, though he could feel her eyes burning through him. He didn't want to talk. Though, if it was going to be anybody, it'd be Jo.

"Did you love her?"

Ah, that question. The bluntest of them all. Did he?

Zaf looked up to find Jo now sitting beside him. "I…don't know. I suppose we just spent too much time together; got too close, you know? I know you're supposed to keep your distance in those kinds of situations, but I couldn't help but care for her. She was in danger. I felt…protective. And I couldn't…I couldn't…" He couldn't go on. Instead, he felt his eyes warm considerably, and gentle tears began to flow silently down his dark skinned cheek. Again, he felt as though he couldn't face anyone. He was alone.

"Shhh," hushed Jo, placing a comforting arm around his shoulder; pulling him closer. Zaf sobbed into her shoulder, welcoming Jo's warm presence.

"I feel so helpless…"

It was strange to see Zaf breaking down. Jo had known him to be a fearless young man, strong and silent, knowledgeable, funny and caring. Seeing him so unstable, so insecure, and so _vulnerable. _Jo felt her heart melt. She almost began crying herself.

"It's okay," she soothed, "just let it all out." She bit her lip to stop herself from sobbing too. "Shhh…"

Jo didn't know how long they sat together, entwined in each other's embrace. After what seemed like hours, Zaf broke away from her, his eyes dry, but still filled with anguish and regret.

"Um, thanks Jo…for that," he said plainly, shifting uncomfortably.

"Anytime," she replied, softly and sincerely.

There was an awkward silence.

They both began to speak at the same time. "Maybe we should…" They stopped, and caught each other's gaze, laughing in spite of themselves.

"Maybe you should what?" came Harry's inquisitive voice from one of the pods. And for once he was smiling. "Maybe you should get to work, perhaps? There's a mountain of paperwork for you, Mr Younis, and a computer waiting to be brought to life by you, Miss Portman. Shall we?"

Zaf and Jo both grinned at Harry's facetious manner, and made their way to their respective desks.

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_Will Zaf get over Mina?_

_Will he and Jo get closer?_

_Will they live happily ever after?_

_When will I update?_

**_Will you review??_ **


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